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WOOZLEBEASTS 


PICTURES AND RHYMES 



THE 


WOOZLEBEASTS 

PICTURES AND RHYMES 
By J. P; BENSON 

< 35 ? 

NEW YORK 

MOFFAT, YARD & CO. 

J905 


* 


U8RARY of OONQRESSj 
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COPYRIGHT, 1905, BY 
MOFFAT, YARD C& CO., NEW YORK 
PUBLISHED SEPTEMBER, 1905 



J. F. TAPLEY CO, 
BOOK MANUFACTURERS 
NEW YORK 


TO 

MARJORIE, PHILIP AND GERTRUDE 

AND LITTLE MARY 






















































































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Contents 


PAGE 

The Egsteela io 

The Phair 12 

The Botong 14 

The Whin . . . \ 16 

The Berlite 18 

The Hippo-Ooray 20 

The Perlane 22 

The Kryme 24 

The Chark 26 

The Blire 28 

The Ho-Zay 3° 

The Grone 3 2 

The Pipe-Lion 34 

The Chorah 36 

The Bzah 38 

The Gastbubble 4° 

The Ko-Chun 4 2 

The Chinta 44 

The Cruze 46 

The Bagoll 48 

The Boh 5° 


7 


CONTENT S — Continued 


PAGE 

The Grind 52 

The Eater 54 

The Jumblerun 56 

The Sea Serpent 58 

The Bent 60 

The Kyle 62 

The Catamarantic 64 

The Laak 66 

The Beerlie 68 

The Zoorabul 70 

The Phee 72 

The Gatt 74 

The Blout 76 

The Mockair 78 

The Durkin 80 

The Iverity 82 

The Tappar 84 

The Mutt 86 

The Gumps 88 

The Blethar 90 

The Jughs 92 


8 


CONTENT S — Continued 


PAGE 

The Shivaree 94 

The Skerwall 96 

The Croaken 98 

The Laim 100 

The Ling 102 

The Ko-Hott 104 

The Bozalia 106 

The Crant 108 

The Ethigorant no 

The Yapp 112 

The Gorinna 114 

The Bismus 116 

The Yott 1 18 

The Kree 120 

The Ogee 122 

The Geet 124 

The Skweel 126 

The Jeigh 128 

The Bazeen 130 

The Jank 132 

The Dredge 134 


9 


The Egsteela 

The Egsteela, fond of a feast, 

Is the prickliest kind of a beast. 

Where the white ostrich nests 
Is the place he infests. 

Is he handsome? Oh, not in the least 



11 




The Phair 

Said the playful but reckless old Phair, 
“I will give that young couple a scare;” 
And he didn’t half try, 

But from sweet Marie’s cry 
He was sure he had startled the pair. 



The Phair 


13 


The Botong 

The monkeys’ best friend, the Botong, 
Does nothing but play all day long. 

He can make them a swing 
Or any old thing, 

He’s so clever and patient and strong. 



The Botong 


15 




The Whin 

When he’s low in his spirits the Whin 
Just collapses and shuts himself in. 

His cover goes flop! 

And at once he’s a-top; 

Just at present he’s out for a spin. 



The Whin 


17 


The Berlite 

The cautious and simple Berlite 
Is unable to put up a fight; 

So with ear to the ground 
He catches each sound, 

For his only protection is flight. 



The Berlite 


19 


The Hippo-Ooray 

The noisy old Hippo-Ooray 
Makes a racket twelve hours a day 
And at night it’s the same, 

He lives up to his name 
With consistency hard to portray. 



21 


The Perlane 

W hen the Monk tricked the guileless Perlane 
It was, as a joke, quite in vain; 

Putting up his umbrella, 

He said, “My dear feller, 

I think it is going to rain.” 



The Perlane 


23 


The Kryme 

The inventive and musical Kryme 
Has constructed this strange woodland chime; 
He spends all his day 
In this innocent way 
And is having a beautiful time. 



The Kryme 


25 


The Chark 


As the last one came out of the Ark, 

Noah whispered to Ham, “That’s the Chark! 
It must never be told 
We had That in our hold; 

I am glad he came out after dark.” 



The Chark 


27 


The Blire 


The polite but ridiculous Blire 
Is really a beast to admire; 

For he apes when he can 
All the customs of man, 

And he finds them not hard to acquire 



29 


The Ho-Zay 

Up in Ottawa where the Ho-Zay 
And other strange animals play 
On the rivers and rinks, 

Hardly any one thinks 
They are anything out of the way. 



The Ho-Zay 


31 


The Grone 


In the backwoods of Sweden the Grone 
Carries wood all day long by his lone. 

A wishbone (for luck), 

Which is used for a truck, 

And the snowshoes and hat are his own. 



The Grone 


33 


The Pipe-Lion 

Instead of barbaric procession 
King Oolah shows modern progression ; 
When he goes out to dine 
He takes the Pipe-Lion 
And creates a most splendid impression. 



So 



The Chorah 


Every evening when hunger comes o’er her 
F rom the depths comes the luminous Chorah, 
And great steamers sail straight 
To a horrible fate, 

For they think it’s the Northern Aurora. 



The Chorah 


37 


The Bzah 


In Moscow a Turkish Bzah 
Makes carpets and rugs for the Czar. 
He not only makes them, 

But measures and shakes them 
And carries them down to the car. 



39 


The Gastbubble 

In the land where the Gastbubble grows 
It rains, or it hails, or it blows; 

And the trick seems to be 
To tie up to a tree 
And to wait till the worst of it goes. 



The Gastbubble 


41 




The Ko-Chun 


Here’s a sketch of the clever Ko-Chun, 
Three years old, andjust see what he’s done ; 
When he gets fully grown 
He’ll have legs of his own 
And be jolly well able to run. 





The Ko-Chun 


43 


The Chinta 


“Do you see that wreck ?” said the old Chinta 
As they watched the poor Hesperus splinter; 
“Well, that is the boat 
Of which Longfellow wrote, 

She gets into trouble each winter.” 



The Chinta 



45 



The Cruze 

They say if you study the Cruze 
It’s an excellent thing for the blues. 
For his freedom from care 
Can’t be matched anywhere, 

And is certain to cheer and amuse. 



The Cruz e 


47 


The Bagoll 

The very important Bagoll 
Doesn’t think for a minute he’s small, 
And he puffs round the bay 
Tooting “Out of my way!” 

And he’s only three feet over all ! 



49 



The Boh 

The musical Boh of Baytong 
Loves to rock himself singing a song — 
Little bits from “Ophelia/’ 
“Hiawatha,” “Bedelia”; 

He is likely to die before long. 



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The Boh 


51 


The Grind 

The tusky-faced, flat-footed Grind, 
Though often to eat feels inclined, 

Is compelled by hard fate 
To keep far from his plate; 

You can see he looks pale but resigned. 



The Grind 


53 


The Bater 

When the famous sea angler, the Bater, 
Goes sliding along the equator 
Little fish meet their fate 
When they jump at the bait, 

Which is sort of a joke, “See you later.” 



The Bater 


55 



The Jumblerun 

Said the jungle boy’s ma, “If you’re tied 
You may go for a very short ride on 
The tame Jumblerun.” 

But he found it no fun, 

For the Jumblerun can’t be relied on. 



The Jumblerun 


The Sea Serpent 

A Lobsterman hauling his pot 
Said, “Glory be, what have I got?” 
It might be a hake, 

Or a sculpin, or snake, 

It’s a sea serpent likely as not. 



59 



The Bent 

Said the most ungrammatical Bent, 
“I hadn’t have ought to have went, 
But they said, ‘If you don’t, 
Why, nobody won’t’; 

I don’t like the job worth a cent.” 



61 


The Kyle 

The useful and valuable Kyle 
Likes to steal every once in a while; 

So his owner (a black) 

Puts a sign on his back 
That his neighbors can read for a mile. 



63 



The Catamarantic 


The athletic Catamarantic 

Can beat anything on the Atlantic; 

Any object that boats, 

Barring gasolene boats, 

Is outclassed by his oarsmanship frantic. 


4 


t 



65 


The Laak 


The Laak, which is prized for its leather, 
Gives amusement for hours together, 
Doing three things at once 
And most wonderful stunts 
With an egg and a hat and a feather. 



The Laak 


67 


The Beerlie 

The muscular hand-walking Beerlie, 
When asked why he acted so queerly, 
Said, “I do as I please, 

And I’m saving my knees; 

It’s a trick of my ancestors merely.” 



The Beerlie 


69 


The Zoorabul 


They have to suspend the old Zoorabul 
On account of his mischief incurable. 

He is hung by his skin, 

Which is wonderfully thin 
And elastic, but thoroughly durable. 



The Zoorabul 


71 





The Phee 

The amphibious young of the Phee 
Never like their first voyage at sea. 
In the way that the tides 
Affect their insides 
They are painfully like you and me. 



78 




The Gatt 

Said the Gatt to Si Hopkins, “Oh, Si ! 
You look scared and disturbed; tell me why. 
When you meet, Si, a Gatt, 

Always take off your hat. 

Don’t be awkward and clumsy and shy.” 



The Gatt 


75 


The Blout 

“Here am I,” said the talkative Blout, 
“A trifle odd-looking, no doubt. 

Yet I’ve heard folks declare 
That I’m only hot air — 

Do you wonder I’m feeling put out ?” 



The Blout 


77 



The Mockair 

When the homely but modest Mockair 
Found a hand mirror — goodness knows 
where — 

He remarked, “Holy cat! 

Am I really like that? 

Now I see why the other folks stare.” 



The Mockair 


79 






The Durkin 

The Czar’s hardy war dog, the Durkin, 
Got a puncture as big as a firkin 
From a fifteen-inch shell. 

He don’t feel very well, 

But it doesn’t prevent him from working. 



The Durkin 


81 


The Kerity 

With a passion for science, the Kerity 
Remarks, with pathetic sincerity: — 
“If I make of this mess 
What I hope to, I guess 
My name will go down to posterity.” 





The Kerity 


83 



The Tappar 

The telephone people out West 
Say the Tappar’ s a regular pest; 

He gets all the news 
Without paying the dues — 

He likes long-distance messages best. 



The Tappar 


85 


The Mutt 


“Just because I am queer,” said the Mutt, 
“They make me a regular butt. 

I’m treated this way 
Six or eight times a day; 

I’ll get angry some time, and that’s what.” 



The Mutt 


87 



The Gumps 

In the Philippine Islands the Gumps 
Lie in wait behind bushes and stumps. 
When the hunters come near 
They fill them with fear 
By their half-human hops, skips and jumps. 



The Gumps 


89 


The Blethar 


Here’s a view of the great Alpine Blethar, 
Which can only be seen in fine weather; 
He counts three when he launches, 

So that both of his haunches 
May pitch him off squarely together. 




The Jughs 

The gossiping Jughs of Dundee 
Are the things tourists go there to see 
For the marmalade trade 
No matter what’s said, 

Is entirely secondaree. 



The Jughs 


93 




The Shivaree 

Here is Postmaster General Eine 
On his Shivaree, looking so fine. 
For Free Rural Delivery, 
Though rough on the Shivaree, 
Seems to educate, culture, refine. 



The Shivaree 


95 



The Skerwall 


The trick of the great white Skerwall 
Is to paint his face black in the fall, 
Then till summer comes round 
He stays deep underground, 

That’s why he’s not handsome at all. 



The Skerwall 


97 


The Croaken 


When bathing look out for the Croaken, 
He has habits that cannot be broken; 
Here he’s stolen a wig 
Which is sizes too big 
And the coat of a man from Hoboken. 



The Croaken 


Lore 


99 



The Laim 


That African biped, the Laim, 

So exceedingly fond of a game, 

Is so lacking in wit 
It takes both to be It ; 

But they’re plenty of fun, just the same. 



101 



The Ling 

The African Baks as a nation 
Are ingenious beyond expectation. 
To capture the Ling 
They put bait on a string. 

The picture gives full explanation. 



The Ling 


103 



The Ko-Hott 


The white, woolly, goat-like Ko-Hott 
Is prized by the Akhoond of Swat, 
Who keeps it indoors 
To mop up the floors 
It looks sort of fierce, but it’s not. 



The Ko-Hott 


105 


The Bozalia 


When the naturalist saw a Bozalia 
He said, “It’s a find, this mammalia. 
If there only were more 
I would turn pedicure 
And regard my past life as a failure.” 



The Bozalia 


107 



The Crant 

It is not many years since the Crant 
Were so numerous in the Levant 
That they caught them in herds; 
Now these wonderful birds 
Are the only two copies extant. 



The Crant 


109 




The Ethigorant 

The tropical Ethigorant 
Has his features all built on the slant, 
To a creature so vain 
This gives infinite pain; 

He would like to look pretty, but can’t. 



Ill 


The Yapp 

’Twas a thorough surprise to the Yapp 
When he found himself caught in the trap, 
And the moral is clear: 

It is best to have fear— 

Even fear of a regular snap. 



118 


The Gorinna 

The elephant-eating Gorinna 
Takes a whole one each day for his dinner, 
Then he eats about half 
Of a good fat giraffe— 

Even so, he gets thinner and thinner. 



The Gorinna 


115 



The Bismus 

When De Lesseps was down on the Isthmus 
They dredged up a tropical Bismus, 

And he sent it to France 
On the very small chance 
That his children would like it for Christmas. 



The Bismus 


] 17 


The Yott 


There are two or three things in the ocean 
Of which landlubbers haven’t a notion. 
The worst of the lot 
Is the frolicsome Yott, 

He creates such an awful commotion. 



no 


The Kree 

The lonesome, unusual Kree 
Is homely as homely can be; 

Perhaps that is why 
He’s so painfully shy 
As he roams through his bogs by the sea. 



121 


The Ogee 

If your lot has been cast by the sea 
You certainly know the Ogee. 

He governs the yawl 
With his ratchet and pawl, 

And is sold with a year’s guarantee. 



123 



The Geet 

The curious cubs of the Geet 
Do nothing but slumber and eat. 

It takes barrels of food 
To do them much good, 

For they’re hollow way down to their feet 



125 




The Skweel 

Here’s a shot at the talented Skweel, 
In his own special automobile, 
Showing not only nerve 
As he swings round the curve, 

But his perfect control of the wheel. 



The Skweel 


irr 


The Jeigh 

In Persia the overworked Jeigh 
Travels hundreds of miles in a c 
He’s the kind of a moose 
That can stand much abuse, 
And they haven’t an S. P. C. A. 



129 



The Bazeen 

When the vessels that pass in the night 
See the weird old Bazeen with his light, 
Then the sailormen know 
It is going to snow 

And they button their overcoats tight. 



The Bazeen 


131 


The Jank 

“I suppose I am getting on fine,” 
Said the Jank as he hauled at the line 
“But using a winch 
For amusement’s no cinch — 

In vacation, small weakfish for mine.” 



The Jank 


133 




The Dredge 

When he made butterscotch, little Sandy 
Put it out near the door, good and handy, 
And forgot that the Dredge, 

That lives under the hedge, 

Was abnormally partial to candy. 



The Dredge 


135 







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